


OUTLINE: Amnesia!Zuko Joins the Earth Army

by MuffinLance



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Azula (Avatar) Redemption, Gen, The Council of Five totally meant for this to happen, Why yes they did purposefully recruit the enemy's heir, Yes that is a very smart move and it is what they did, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, Zuko joins the Earth Kingdom Army, amnesia!Zuko, and is The Best Scout, his Captain knows better than to give him strict orders, it WILL get solved, just set this kid lose on a problem, some ostrich-horse theft may occur, this is a test of the emergency outlining system, who deserves all the dads in the world
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-25
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-10-28 08:21:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20775464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MuffinLance/pseuds/MuffinLance
Summary: Zuko loses his memory and becomes an Earth Kingdom war hero. His father is going to LOVE this.





	1. Li Wakes Up In The Army

**Author's Note:**

> So this goddamn thing had my brain up half the night. WHY BRAIN. (I love you brain.) (Best use of not-sleep ever.) But seeing as my list of future Zuko fics is several years long let's just go ahead and give you guys the outline view for this Story I Probably Won't Ever Get To.
> 
> Nonnie-On-Tumblr-Put-An-Idea-In-My-Head Theatre proudly presents
> 
> A production of MuffinLance's Barely Edited Outlines, Inc

So Zuko gets knocked out during the town fight in Zuko Alone. When he wakes up, he's at an Earth Army outpost. Pre-filled enlistment paperwork was sent along with him. He's sixteen years old, it says. Mother's Occupation: Prostitute. Father: Unknown. They ask him if that's right and he… doesn't know? No really, he doesn't know. Not even the name part. What's it say, again? Okay, so he's Li. That's… good to know.

Some kid is there too. He says his name is also Lee and he Will Not Stop Fussing over Li's not-even-that-serious-quit-poking-it headwound. The kid's paperwork also says sixteen. Sixteen being minimum recruitment age.

The Captain looks between the obviously underage kid and the one not asking 'Where am I' but _ 'Who _am I' and just instinctively learns the pinch-the-bridge-of-the-nose-for-headaches trick. Not being totally stupid, he does not put the literal child and the teenager with head trauma into uniforms. He opens a Shu-damned investigation into that backwater town's recruitment practices, sets these two up in the barracks, and tells them to stay out of the way while this gets sorted.

Hahaha meet <strike> Zuko </strike> Li.

So Li is nominally in charge of keeping Lee out of trouble but it's more like the other way around. Also the camp at large is getting really confused by this Li and Lee thing, you can't exactly pronounce the spelling difference, so now it's Little Lee and What the Fuck Li (if I actually wrote this I'd pick something different but my outlines are a MOOD). Little Lee quickly emerges as the responsible one of the pair. This is on a sliding scale of responsibility, because Big Li AKA What the Fuck Li is just. What the fuck.

A partial list of the things What the Fuck Li does not know:

\- That there is a war going on

\- That he is on the Earth Kingdom side

\- Yes this is an Earth Kingdom camp

\- Yes, Li. In the Earth Kingdom. 

\- JUST TAKE THE MAP LI

\- Li give the map back, you've been hunched over it for three hours, are you even blinking?

Additional things Li doesn't know:

\- How to cook rice without turning it into an impressive three-layer disaster of burning-gooey-undercooked grains

\- How to use his Indoor Voice

\- How to boil water, how can you not even know that, oh wait— 

\- How to use spark rocks, that was the problem

Yet more things Li does not know:

\- That he is a master goddamn swordsman what the fuck Li

\- That it's not normal to be able to disappear into the shadows at will when dodging latrine duty. What The Fuck Li, you were gone for like three hours, NO "I WAS IN THE RAFTERS" IS NOT AN ACCEPTABLE EXPLANATION

\- That when the Captain says 'we need more information on where they're keeping the prisoners' it is not permissible to disappear for two days and return with a hand-drawn map of the enemy camp and an ostrich-horse where did you get an ostrich-horse did you goddamn steal an ostrich-horse while you were out scouting? Suuuure 'It just came up to me and started beaking my hair' wait a second you're trying to distract from the fact you broke into a Shu-damned Fire Nation camp because of an offhanded comment WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK LI

So anyway they rescue Sensu and Gansu and a whole bunch of other prisoners. Little Lee is ecstatic. By now the investigation into the whole recruitment debacle is complete and the town soldiers who started this mess are reassigned to the front and Lee's brother can be assigned to his town sure why not, and Little Lee gets to go home. There are hugs and thanks and standing invitations to come live with them if this amnesia thing persists (or even if it doesn't), they could always use an extra pair of hands on the farm, though maybe they'll keep him away from roof repairs this time (Li nods along with their friendly laughter, because he's learning to just nod whenever people reference things that He Should Probably Remember.) Little Lee returns the 'Never Give Up Without a Fight' knife to Big Li before he goes. Big Li, of course, reads the 'Made in the Earth Kingdom' side first.

...So Little Lee just abandoned the Earth Army to wrangle What the Fuck Li on their own. The Captain preemptively takes some Military Grade Headache Tonic, and sends for Li to meet with him in the command tent.

Big Li's paperwork is probably just as fake as Little Lee's. He's free to go with the family who was ten seconds away from adopting him. Just tell the nice Captain you're fifteen, Li.

"I'm sixteen, sir," Li says, fully aware of what he's doing. Because he feels oddly at home around all these uniforms, and people here like him, which is a feeling that's weird and nice and he doesn't think it's unfamiliar and strange-new because of the amnesia. And he can make a difference here. He feels like that's new, too: like whoever he was before, he was doing something pointless that maybe he didn't even want to do. 

The Captain inducts Li into his scouts, because there is no goddamn way Li would function in a regularly regimented army unit. 

And oh hey did I mention their unit has taken some Fire Nation prisoners? 'Cause they have. Either from that Gansu/Sensu breakout or offloaded on them from another unit, eh, minor worldbuilding details. Point is that they have and Li hears the 'dress them up in our uniforms and put them on the frontlines' thing and he is NOT OKAY WITH THIS.

The Captain gets some mental squad scheduling done while Li gets his indignant shouting out. 

Addendum to the list of things Li doesn't know:

\- That jokes exist. Yes, that one was tasteless. No, we are not actually doing that. (Yes, there are rumors the Fire Nation actually does that to our prisoners. No, in this unit we do not retaliate in kind.)

Okay, Li is mollified. A little. Wait no he's not, because BASIC FOOD AND HYGIENE CONCERNS. 

And that's when Li's camp duty becomes prison guard. When he's not off being scouty. 

This is also when the Fire Nation prisoners get really confused because, uh. Sir, I mean Your Highness, I mean… are you…?

No they are mistaken, Li is from the Earth Kingdom. It says so right on his enlistment papers. (Thinking of his _ Father: Unknown _ makes his head hurt, but when he thinks of his mother he gets fleeting images of a woman in overly rich clothes with a subtle perfume smell about her, and he knows he loved her and was loved, and her clothing kind of does fit the _ Occupation: Prostitute _ thing and his own gold eyes fit the _ Father: Unknown _ thing so maybe the town soldiers didn't lie on his paperwork after all.) The point is these Fire Nation prisoners clearly have no idea what they're talking about, have they ever even seen their prince?

Well no but there are pictures of Ozai everywhere and for an Earth Kingdom soldier you are oddly concerned about our welfare— 

I AM NOT ODDLY CONCERNED I'M JUST DOING WHAT'S RIGHT

Okay but still you are like a mini-Ozai. Except for the giant distinctive scar. That the prince supposedly has.

(Which is when Asks Too Many Questions Prisoner gets elbowed by More Discrete Prisoner, and they have a talk about how _ if the prince of their nation has infiltrated the Earth Kingdom's army, maybe we should NOT blow his cover.) _

_ (Oh yeeaaaah, _ Asks Too Many Questions agrees. And from there on it's all wink-wink nudge-nudge _ thank you for the additional blankets and extra rations, Totally Anonymous Earth Kingdom Scout.) _

_ (Siiiigh, _ says More Discrete Prisoner.)

And that's how Li earns undying loyalty from a group of prisoners who think he's playing the long con. 

But anyway back to Li's scouting exploits. There's like, a lot. Li earns some goddamn Earth Army medals, and he would have earned more but his Captain Does Not Want To Encourage some of these behaviors. They're Crazy Dramatic Awesome. They are an escalation of WHAT THE FUCK LI until the phrase loses all meaning, like a candle snuffed by the all-encompassing fire of the sun. They are Sir Not Appearing In This Outline.

Most importantly: at some point Li finds a wanted poster of a ponytailed jerk and an old guy. He pockets this and Does Not Show It To The Captain. Shortly thereafter, Scout Li finds some disturbing definitely-not-Earth-Kingdom tank tracks. Also lots of white fur, he's a little concerned about that, is there an albino sabertooth moose-lion with mange running around? Because he doesn't need that in his life again. 

So anyway he follows the tracks. And there's definitely a Fire Nation unit on the move. And in some random deserted town he meets Crazy Blue and the Avatar and the Avatar's posse who hate him on sight which is… a disturbingly familiar feeling? Like being hated on sight is normal and he should just accept it? Also there's this old guy hugging him and he does NOT know what that is about. 

(He does not want to know what that is about. Because all of them are calling him a name that IS NOT HIS and it hurts his head and Crazy Blue and the Old Guy called him brother and nephew and they were both _ imperial firebenders _and could everyone please SHUT UP FOR FIVE SECONDS THANK YOU.)

They shut up for five seconds. ...Thank you.

Li very calmly (read: CALMLY HE IS CALM) explains that this is a common mistake, there's a bunch of Fire Nation prisoners who think he's this prince guy too, but he's clearly not (and clearly not about to have a panic attack if he thinks too hard about _ what-if-he-is _ so he's just not. going to think. about that.) He is in fact Li, scout for the 35th Light Infantry Division, Earth Kingdom Army, and could they please move this discussion back to his unit's camp where the Captain can offer support against further Fire Nation attacks.

…

……

WHAT THE FUCK ZUKO.

Says literally everyone. The Old Guy is more polite about it. Offers him some tea. Does he just carry that teapot around?

"He is shitting you not, guys," Toph helpfully diagnoses. "I don't know who you're seeing, but he believes every word he just said. Mostly."

"Mostly," Sokka repeats. "Well that's mostly reassuring."

So they bison-follow Li NOT ZUKO STOP CALLING HIM THAT back to camp.

"Oh wow, it really isn't a trap," is not what the Captain expects from the Avatar's first words to him.

"Wait, so if we gave Zuko brain damage we could have turned him into a productive member of the Earth Kingdom months ago?" Sokka comments. "Aang why were you not hitting him through walls harder."

"I AM NOT ZUKO," Li shouts, which gets him kicked out of the command tent while these horrible children who hate him feed his commander their lies, they have to be lies, if they're true then this life he built for himself can't continue, the Prince of the Fire Nation can't be an Earth Kingdom scout, not even if he was happy here and good at it and doing something useful for once in his life instead of chasing the Ava—

Oh hi migraine. Li is just going to curl up in his bunk and never move again (never think again).

Meanwhile back in the tent the Captain listens and then politely asks these kids to leave in the morning and not spread rumors about Scout Li. Li is a part of this unit now, and his paperwork clearly says he is Earth Kingdom, and that is the end of this discussion. Dismissed.

"Uh," Sokka says. "But really, Prince of the Fire—"

_ Dismissed. _

The Avatar's group leaves the command tent. The Captain calls Li in. Li pulls himself together and looks only a little like death when he shows up, and the Captain assigns him his next scouting mission with zero fanfare like Li is still a worthwhile human being and a part of this army. 

Things Li has learned how to do:

\- Salute smartly

\- Ruin said salute with the goofiest damn smile the Captain has ever seen, like this kid has never received approval from anyone in his life

There are some serious Approving Parent vibes between the Captain and Zuko all story, guys. Your hearts would be lightly toasted over a fire with marshmallows and get all gooey and shit. If I wrote this. Which I won't.

Anyway back to writing this.

So Uncle quietly disappeared between the abandoned town and the camp, because his nephew appears safe and happy at the moment and because if anyone is going to recognize the Dragon of the West, it's a literal army unit. Which wouldn't really help Zuko much. Even if Uncle's pretty sure the Avatar's group is ratting his nephew out right now. Which is why he's camped on some bluff overlooking the camp, where he can rain fire and destruction if he sees any worrisome commotions. He does not. 

Toph finds him and they have tea. She tells him that the Avatar's group basically just got politely kicked out. "That Captain guy seems to like your nephew."

Uncle is happy-jealous of this other man successfully parenting the nephew who ran off on him.

"So Nephew Hot Stuff's in the military. Guess you have some free time now. Why don't you become Aang's firebending teacher?"

Uncle has many years of practice in not spitting out his tea, and puts it to good use in this moment. 

And that's how Uncle leaves with the Gaang the next morning. They pick him up from the bluff, because Still Not Walking Into A Military Camp. Uncle has Toph deliver a letter to his nephew. It's a Don't Forget Who You Are letter with a I Will Be In Ba Sing Se If You Need Me (I Will Light This Nation On Fire If You Need Me) post script.

Zuko no wait LI he is LI recognizes the handwriting. And shoves the letter into his pocket unread. And carries it everywhere with him, because it feels like home even if he doesn't know what home feels like. 

And Scout Li keeps merrily scouting it up (and the soldiers in his unit have all heard the rumors about who he really is but, come on, Li? Their Li?)

Then Everything Changes When the Fire Nation Attacks, and Li unconsciously starts using his bending to deflect flames from his comrades and oh shit he remembers how to do this so he starts doing it consciously now, and it's really not subtle at all and everyone is side-eyeing him but he's going to reschedule this panic attack until everyone is safe again and just trust them not to launch boulders at his back while he's protecting them.

Everyone is safe again. 

WHAT THE FUCK LI.

No wait we didn't mean to shout Li get back here, sit your ass down while the bulkiest guy in the unit wraps an arm around your shaking shoulders, have some goddamn water and an energy bar, BREATHE. Good fighting. And good bending. That, umm. That shouldn't have surprised us as much as it did, really makes sense now why you didn't know how to use spark rocks, haha… ha. (SHUT UP TOKEN UNIT NAYSAYERS CALLING FOR LI'S BLOOD LET'S HAVE A CHAT OVER HERE BEHIND THIS TENT.)

Li drinks his goddamn water and gets some sleep and no one tries to murder him while he's out. He wakes up and cleans himself up pretty, shines his shoes and (attempts to) comb his hair and everything, and presents himself at the Captain's tent.

Where he puts a wanted poster on the desk, and his swords, and turns himself in. Because he doesn't have many of his memories back but the amount of petty rage he feels at the poster-makers _ spelling his name wrong _ is probably not a coincidence. He's the Prince of the Goddamn Fire Nation, and he's ready to be put with the rest of the prisoners. Sir. 

Fuck that shit, the Captain does not say, because the Captain does not swear. But he's got this ridiculously honorable teenager standing in front of his desk at parade ground rest, and the Captain's pretty sure that if he doesn't arrest the kid than Li or Zuko or whatever his name is will take that ostrich-horse of his and go turn himself in to another unit, to some commander who doesn't know who they've got on their hands (because _ 'what' _ they've got on their hands is Prince Zuko, Banished Prince of the Fire Nation. But _ 'who' _ they have on their hands is a kid who can't follow orders to save his life but as long as a commander knows that, the brat can be sent out to work goddamn miracles.)

The Captain does the only reasonable thing: he promotes Li to Lieutenant. He fixes his paperwork (Li gets crossed out, Zuko gets penciled in. I DON'T SPELL IT THAT WAY SIR. ...Sorry sir I didn't mean to shout sir.) The promotion is so Scout <strike>Li</strike> Zuko doesn't have to take shit from random grunts as he completes his next mission, and also because if there was ever a soldier trained for the officer corps it's the goddamn Fire Lord's son. Then the Captain gives him orders to report to the Council of Five in Ba Sing Se. He sends urgent letters ahead and a letter of introduction with him which reads, in short:

This is the Prince of the Fire Nation and he's loyal to the Earth Kingdom. Don't screw this up for us, please and thank you. Also he's under my command and if he misses sending a check-in report I will find you and murderize you.

Sincerely yours,

Captain Zuko's-Earth-Kingdom-Dad

_ End Part 1: Li Wakes Up In The Army _


	2. Lieutenant Zuko Li Ba Sing Se's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit guys thank you for the response to this humble outline's first part. 300 kudos overnight? Holy shit?
> 
> Also, if you are reading this and getting inspired, I fully encourage you to Write The Thing. Please just give a shout out back to this outline in your author's notes. Preferably click the "This work is a remix, a translation, a podfic, or was inspired by another work" checkbox when subbing your story, then we will be linked together. WOO TWO-WAY READER TRANSFER.
> 
> There are currently three lovely people already jumpin' to write this, one who's gonna do it mostly straight and two who're gonna take it their own route, and you can rest assured I will hella point it out when those fics launch, 'cause I am hungry to read them too. (Announcements will be in the notes on this fic + on [Tumblr](https://muffinlance.tumblr.com).)
> 
> Plus let's be honest, it will be hilariously confusing for anyone not in the loop if they see twenty "amnesia!Zuko joins the Earth Army" stories pop up within days of each other. Like, their faces, guys. Can we please confuse the internet? Yes thank you?

So Lieutenant Zuko Li and his ostrich-horse Song (she looked like a Song. He… doesn't know why?) are on the road to Ba Sing Se. He comes across a preggers lady and her husband and the guy's sister going the same way, which means now Li and the husband and sister are walking and the nice lady is riding because SHE IS ALARMINGLY PREGNANT and even though this will slow him down the Captain preemptively worked What The Fuck Li random-encounter-time into his schedule. These people are actually some kind of good luck charm, because  _ nothing else happens to him  _ on the road and they actually arrive at the ferry port two days ahead of Scout Li's (... _ Zuko _ Li's.  _ Lieutenant  _ Zuko Li's) schedule. 

(Zuko Li does not know that the Avatar's bison did  _ not _ get stolen in this AU, because he has no way of knowing that Uncle's general lack of rope-climbing fitness led to him cheerfully offering to remain outside the spirit library with Toph. Oh man those sandbenders did NOT expect the Dragon of the West. You can only decline his pleasant  _ Perhaps we can talk this out over tea _ offer once before he gets SERIOUS. But anyway, no bison theft, so Than and Ying did not get an Avatar escort so much as an Avatar flyover.)

The Lieutenant and his escortees arrive at the port without incident. Zuko Li stops a pickpocket from swiping their passports, dumps the thief on port security, and gets his first chance at trying out his Lieutenant voice. Wow that is  _ fun,  _ he's a natural, these guards aren't even in the military chain of command and they're Sir Yes Sir'ing him. The thief gets  _ so arrested.  _ Zuko (...Li. Zuko  _ Li)  _ makes sure Than and Ying and Cannonically Unnamed Sister board their ferry safely, and awkwardly pats Ying's back as she does that hugging thing people sometimes seem motivated to do to him. And promises to look them up once he gets in the city, because she won't let him go until he does, and this is getting uncomfortable in a way where he might not ever want to leave her Warm Mom Arms ever again if she keeps hugging him so  _ okay he'll visit he promises good luck with the creating a human life thing.  _ His own ferry ticket is for two days from now, so he decides to offer his services to the port authority to hassle some more petty criminals preying on the destitute. 

His temporary commanding officer is a girl his own age. She looks at him and gets  _ That Look,  _ the one where he knows she knows Zuko. Who is not to be confused with Zuko Li. She signals to her other girls (this is more girls in uniform than he's seen his entire time in the military, or his entire life, which are effectively the same thing but one of them sounds more impressive), and  _ politely escorts _ him to a quiet corner where they can box him in and probably subdue him without any refugees getting in the crossfire. Which is a very sound tactic, and he approves, and goes along quietly, and keeps his hands visible and very far from his swords. 

"I don't know what you're playing at—" the girl's name is Suki and she's shorter than him but more intimidating than most of the giant burly men he knows. Also wow that fan against his throat is sharp. 

"Maybe you should, ah… read the letter in my pocket? It's from my commander."

No not his Fire Nation commander, he doesn't— Look just read the letter okay? But please be gentle with it he can already tell he's going to be showing this to  _ so many people.  _ Should he reach for it, or does she want to…? Okay getting frisked now, that's cool. You know I'm a firebender so the weapons check is a little redundant, right? Oh, I burned your village down. Cool, cool. Umm. Sorry about that?

She reads the letter. 

"What the fuck Zuko," Suki says, and does not listen now or at any point in the next two days when he states his preference for Li, or maybe Zuko Li if she  _ has _ to work the Zuko in there somewhere, he's really still just trying to get used to that in his own head. But at least she's not calling him 'Prince', apparently he winced hard enough at that to dissuade future attempts. Or she just doesn't want to start a riot in a crowd of Fire-Nation-adverse refugees.

The Kyoshi warriors take turns guarding him while he guards the port. There are some more hijinks with thieves, small children asking inappropriate questions about his giant facial scar, and just small children interacting with Zuko Li in general because that is my jam. He is ridiculously good with the lost child they find, the brat only screams when Suki tries to hold her but the evil Prince of the Fire Nation quickly bribes her to hiccupy-teary silence with frantic promises of ostrich-horse rides. If she's real tall up on top of an ostrich-horse than her mom will find her faster, right? Right? 

Goddamn Prince of the Fire Nation sounding half-panicked at any renewed threat of child-tears, Suki  _ will not fall for this devious act.  _

The child, meanwhile, waves and jumps up and down on a very patient and long-suffering Song the Ostrich-Horse as she spots her momma over the crowd. There are reunions and thanks and Zuko is starting to get better at this hugging thing, he thinks? It's easier with little kids, they don't seem to even expect him to hug back.

Zuko spends the night in the Kyoshi warriors' camp, which he pretends was his choice and they let him pretend that while denying him a watch shift and making him help cook dinner over his entitled rich boy protests.

Things Zuko Li still hasn't learned: 

\- How not to render rice into a weapons-grade product

...He tried to warn them.

The day of Zuko Li's ferry ticket arrives. Zuko Li mails his last pre-Ba-Sing-Se letter before he boards, per orders, so if he disappears the Captain will know which side of the wall he did it on (Suki reads this letter approximately a million times, but has to admit it's A) harmless, and B) traveling by literal Earth Army post so probably not a Fire Nation spying thing). Suki has triple-checked with all available authority sources that she's really actually supposed to let the Prince of the Fire Nation take the fucking ferry into the Earth Kingdom's last stronghold, and yes they told her last time, he's expected. She still doesn't actually believe this, especially since the people confirming things sound just as confused and is-this-a-joke as she does. So when Zuko (Li. Can you please add the 'Li', we've been over this, just because I respond to 'Zuko' doesn't mean I  _ want _ to respond to 'Zuko'—) (Yeah Suki doesn't care, Zuko) so when Zuko gets on the ferry, so does Suki, as his personal guard-escort-paranoid-watcher. So does his ostrich-horse, of course, because THIS IS A SPECIALLY TRAINED SCOUT ANIMAL THAT HAS PASSED RIGOROUS MILITARY INSPECTION FOR DISEASE HOW DARE YOU INSINUATE MY GOODGIRL!SONG HAS DUST-LICE OF COURSE I'M NOT LEAVING HER AT PORT DO I NEED TO GET MY COMMANDER TO TALK TO YOURS  _ (wow  _ it is awesome being a Lieutenant, Lieutenants must have all the fun.)

(Somewhere across the world, Lieutenant Jee gets the distinct feeling his culture is being misappropriated.)

Suki crosses her arms and leans against the rail. Zuko leans  _ over _ the rail, in kind of an alarming way, but if he falls off and drowns that would end most of Suki's concerns with this situation. He  _ really likes  _ being on a boat and doesn't know why. (You were on a navy ship, Zuko. For three years, or something.) (That makes no sense. How old was I when I started, thirteen? Who puts a thirteen-year-old in the navy?) (Suki is beginning to develop a face-slap-dent on her forehead.)

Enter Jet, stage left.

Enter  _ incredible Scout-Li-fanboy Jet,  _ stage left. Because this Li kid is his age and hasn't even been in the army that long but his exploits are already  _ legendary.  _ Plus that scar and that grump, this guy clearly knows the Evils of the Fire Nation, no convincing required. 

Zuko Li has a hard time  _ not _ noticing the hook-sword teenager stalking him. WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM.

Oh-shit-he's-talking-to-me Fanboy Mode  _ Activate.  _

Smellerbee and Longshot apologize for their friend's behavior. Zuko Li is… kind of okay with this? Because it started out with  _ way too many personal questions  _ but then they got on the topic of swords and now he's 100% on board with comparing the relative advantages of dual dao v. hook swords, and can… can he hold those? 

YOU MAY ALSO HOLD MY FIRSTBORN CHILD BUT IN LIEU OF THAT PLEASE HOLD MY SWORDS

These are beautiful

NO U

Suki is just going to work that face-slap-dent a little harder. Also they are both wrong, fans are superior.

Smellerbee and Longshot realize their intervention is not required, because their old friend and their new friends are all Big Damn Nerds, so they go off to join the dinner line instead, sure Jet and Suki we'll pick something up for you, don't get up on our account. A crewman has stopped by to invite the Lieutenant up to the officer's deck for dinner, so food breaks all around. (Suki is  _ not _ miffed about not getting an invite of her own. Does this Captain even know what a Kyoshi Warrior is?) (Answer: No. No he doesn't. She is a little girl with no military rank, and are those  _ fans?  _ Doesn't she have a real weapon?)

_ (Pfft,  _ Jet says.)

A further thing Zuko Li does not know:

\- Basic officer etiquette 

So he grabs a plate of food from the ferry captain's table and doesn't actually have dinner with the people who invited him, just bolts back down the steps because they might have outvoted Suki on the fans but Jet  _ implied that dao were inferior too  _ and they need to have WORDS.

Zuko Li looks at his new friend-like-people's Bowls of Questionable Edibility and his own Plate of Solid Yum and realizes there are some other people he needs to have WORDS with. Especially since the thought of preggers-Ying eating this literal slop two days ago makes him physically ill.

Has he mentioned how goddamn fun the Lieutenant voice is? 

The refugees get some Real Goddamn Food. And Lieutenant Zuko Li gets some cheering when he comes back on deck, he didn't know he was being  _ that _ loud— 

Suki pats him on the shoulder as he tries to hide from the crowd. This is an Extremely Approving Gesture from her and he is suitably confused, but kind of smiles back, was that the right reply? She looks suddenly angry and is muttering to herself about  _ not fraternizing with the enemy  _ so probably he did it wrong. 

"You were 120% being that loud." The hook-sword bastard grins around his mouth grass. Where does he keep getting grass, they are on a ship, did he stuff his shirt before they left port or something? "Probably a natural overcompensation for those  _ short swords _ of yours."

Oh it is ON. 

Having now met Li, Jet has gone so far past his hero worship he's wrapped around the other side to tease-the-hell-out-of-this-kid manic glee. Like, it's so easy to get a rise out of Li, is there anything that  _ doesn't?  _ Jet will thoroughly test this, for science. Also Zuko is a hella Fire Nation name, why does your number one fangirl keep calling you that?

I WILL MURDER YOU AND IT WON'T BE IN YOUR SLEEP, SMUG MUG

TRY IT FANGIRL

For some mysterious reason the 'why does she call you Zuko' question always gets derailed before it can be answered. 

They don't destroy the ferry before it reaches port. At the port, Zuko Li files a formal complaint against the ferry captain and his officers because they have clearly been skimming funds on refugee supplies and cheating the proud Earth Kingdom government in a time of war and other super-patriotic things that are giving Suki a headache because they are coming from Prince Zuko. There is a vendor selling calming tea and she is just gonna go buy herself a cup of that. 

Hey. Hey, Li. 

I am trying to Write Fiery Justice Onto A Standardized Police Form, Jet, what do you want.

You should join my Freedom Fighters.

No, you should stop being an ill-supplied vigilante and join the Earth Army. 

...Jet will think about it, once 'Bee is old enough to enlist. This new start ain't looking so bad. See you around, Scout ZuLi.

Li. _ Lieutenant _ Li. STOP LAUGHING AT ME, THIS REPORT IS DONE SO I AM LEAVING NOW GOODBYE.  _ Grumble grumble  _ hate that guy, hate him so much I might have to track him down just to yell at him some more, him and his beautiful swords.

(Suki, meanwhile, is fighting against the urge to ask Zuko to warm her tea for her. But she does not want to think of firebending as mundane and useful, so she self-hate drinks the cup gross-cold.)

So anyway Zuko Li and his uniform and his new lieutenant bars and his medals pinned shinily on his chest are impressive enough to get him waved through customs real damn quick (he feels a little too showy, but the soldiers back in his unit all agreed that Ba Sing Se's customs officials were Big Giant Pains to normal-looking people, so he should put on a show for the bored government officials.) Suki is with him and gets waved through by association, she is Not Okay with how little respect she is getting, and is starting to think she should have taken her Kyoshi Warriors and presented them to the Earth King as the foriegn dignitaries they are instead of letting the port officials co-opt her authority for basic security grunt tasks. 

They do not take the train that most people are getting on (what is a train? Oh wow is THAT a train?) (Yes Zuko. That is a train DO NOT GO ON THE RAILS TO GET A CLOSER LOOK WHAT THE FUCK ZUKO HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE.) (Captain My-Earth-Kindgom-Dad asks that a lot, too.) 

Zuko does not get run over by a train, only yelled at by the train operators for the uncultured country hick he clearly is. Then they go to check in at Command HQ on the outer wall. 

Command HQ is like, 'wtf mate, we honestly thought we decoded Captain Your-Earth-Kingdom-Dad's message wrong. Because dude said  _ the Prince of the Fire Nation  _ is a rising star in our own army.'

'Yes that is me'

'But that is umpossible'

'No I am right here'

(Suki is okay with watching someone else get a headache for a change, especially when this person is Zuko. And also everyone around Zuko. Pretty much anyone whose name isn't 'Suki', actually.)

Things are eventually elevated to the Council of Five, who weren't bothered with the Obviously Decoded Wrong message until now, and so it is a complete surprise to them when Prince Lieutenant Zuko Li of the Fire Nation, Scout for the 35th Light Infantry Division of the Earth Kingdom Army and Heir to the Dragon Throne, stands before them in his freshly ironed uniform and bows.

They have his service record. It's, umm. It's a thing. He has both a higher medal-to-mission ratio than they've ever seen and a list of official-complaints-from-the-poor-saps-outside-his-unit-forced-to-deal-with-him long enough that it has personally killed at least one tree. And his newly fixed paperwork is too honest to live, much like its still-waiting-for-permission-to-rise subject matter.

Name:  <strike> Li </strike> Zuko ("I still prefer Li, sir. No sir sorry sir I didn't mean to interrupt you sir.")

Mother:  <strike> Unknown </strike> Ursa

Profession:  <strike> Prostitute </strike> Stay-at-Home Politician

Father:  <strike> Unknown </strike> Ozai

Profession:  <strike> Unknown </strike> Fire Lord

...Is this a joke, Lieutenant? 

Sir no sir. Captain My-Earth-Kingdom-Dad should have sent a letter ahead about my, umm,  _ circumstances.  _ I, uh. I have a copy?

The Council of Five has not invited Zuko Li to sit. Or to be at ease. So Zuko Li is very much not at ease, and still bowing, and sweating a little behind his shiny medals and new rank bars as the kingdom's highest generals look at this kid over the paperwork saying that Scout Goddamn Li is the _Firelord's Son. _And that both Zuko and his Captain decided it was a good idea to write that down. On official government documents. Why.

Falsifying military documents is a crime, sir.

...Says the kid who is notorious throughout all local military units for  _ not following orders.  _ And who is, again,  _ the Fucking Fire Lord's Son. _

Give us one reason not to lock you away, Prince Zuko.

The Fucking Fire Lord's Son's shoulders sag—wait, no, they  _ relax. _ And he accepts the jail threat as permission to rise, because one bow is definitely not going to make a difference to his prison term and/or execution date.

_ Thank you,  _ sirs. I told my Captain he should and he  _ promoted me,  _ how does that make any  _ sense,  _ I'm an enemy to your nation. I mean I'm not actually, I like being a scout but I'm the  _ Fucking Fire Lord's Son.  _ I don't actually remember  _ being  _ his son but it doesn't make any sense to let me keep walking around, what if I  _ do _ remember and I get all…  _ grr, evil. _ I mean I don't think I actually would because I fucking love my unit—I mean, I like them, I mean, they're okay I guess—

The Council of Five collectively experiences their first What-the-Fuck-Zuko-Li headache. And either this kid is a master manipulator or he really is just as honest as he seems. The Captain's letter mentioned head trauma. Which. Explains a lot, really. Could they please also have One (1) Head Trauma and forget about this whole thing? No? Okay so they'll have to deal with this then.

Zuko Li is ordered to go back to the barracks, because they are going to need to get this figured the fuck out, and having him continue to list Earth-Kingdom-minded reasons he should be imprisoned is not helping anyone think. And it seems like a really bad idea to toss  _ the Fire Lord's heir who is tripping over himself to be loyal to the Earth Kingdom  _ into prison, after all it's not like child abuse makes anyone  _ more _ loyal

oh wait

But anyway they put him on house arrest. But forget to directly tell him he's on house arrest. 'Go back to the barracks' meant 'go back and stay', but it was an unsafe assumption that Zuko Li himself would infer this, and having read his service records they have no one to blame but themselves. So he goes back and tells Suki that things went  _ Okay I guess, it was a little unclear? Why is no one putting me in prison? _ and they commiserate over his continued freedom as they go to the mess to grab some dinner. 

Scout Li is pretty well known and has  _ the most recognizable face ever  _ so he gets a half-warm, half-super-skeptical, no-way-you-really-did-that welcome when people realize he's there. And who's your friend? 

People have also heard of the Kyoshi Warriors. And appreciate the work they're doing to make passage safer for refugees. Suki does not need to murder the world anymore, these people are all right. 

There are heart-warming bonding activities like discovering how easy it is to rile the kid up (very easy, on a scale from 1 to 10 he is -1 easy), testing how over-exaggerated Li's combat skills are com'on let's spar (NOT EXAGGERATED AT ALL) (pfft you're just weak, here let me try—WHAT THE FUCK WERE THERE ALWAYS TWO SWORDS), and taking him out drinking on the town 'cause they're not on duty and he's not on duty and com'on little miss Leader of the Kyoshi Warriors, you're with us, bet you can't hold your liquor.

(This is true, but she knows when to stop drinking.)

(Scout Li also knew, he was feeling really strange guys this is his last drink okay? But then his One Last Drink kept getting refilled when he turned his head and it's—it's magical, the water level never goes down, what is this drink, he will CONQUER IT)

(The Prince of the Fire Nation is a happy drunk. He shoulder-bumps Suki, which is maybe more physical contact than she's ever seen him initiate, and his smile is stupidly endearing, like he's a real kid her own age and not Prince Asshole, Son of the World's Biggest Asshole. Less endearing is carrying his drunk ass back to the barracks, but she is a leader for a reason and she quickly outsources his shoulder-leaning to the people whose fault this is.)

So anyway insert some more general good-natured bonding with Suki and Ba Sing Se's wall division (and IMMEDIATE CLARIFICATION WHILE-HE'S-STILL-HUNGOVER THAT HE IS NOT TO LEAVE WITHOUT AUTHORIZATION AGAIN). Possibly some scout missions, because the other scouts have got to be feeling competitive about this new kid, and Zuko Li has got to be feeling cooped up and bored.

Obviously this blessed ignorance cannot last, so a few ideas for a reveal:

\- Zuko is a dumbass and thinks 'my unit and the Council know I'm a firebender' equates to 'I can train my bending' and the people who like sparring with him just find him casually doing firebending katas in the training grounds early one morning, oh hi guys, I left my swords back in the barracks but I could go get them real quick— WHAT THE FUCK LI.

\- Rumors start about what the heck has the Council of Five locked up in a room re-drawing all their war plans, and someone leaks the 'Scout Li is Prince Zuko' thing. Cue the mess hall being  _ angry-silent  _ the next time he comes to eat and people who'd been friendly before actively moving elsewhere when he sits down and I really want to use the line "So you're the fucking Fire Lord's son" "I hear there was some fucking involved in my creation, yes" and Zuko Li nervously seeking approval for his joke and being  _ painfully obvious  _ about wanting to be liked and just. Is this kid for real? Fuck it's like kicking a puppy-kitten. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE LIKE HIM OKAY.

So there is drama and friction and not everyone is won over by Zuko Li being his Zuko-y self, but there are pretty strict orders from on high to Not Murder Him Please while the Council discusses the feasibility of installing this kid as their puppet ruler if they could just, ya'know, off the Fire Lord. Too bad no one has a plan for doing that. No definitely no one in the city. 

Meanwhile: the Gaang is in the city and meeting with canon roadblocks to speaking with anyone in power. Only real difference is they have +1 sky bison chillin' in their backyard, eating more hay than their Joo Dee initially budgeted for. Good thing Joo Dee is such an adaptable lady, she fixes that problem right up for them, and it will only be about six to eight weeks until their petition to see the Earth King receives a reply!

Okay but we have a literal Appa, Sokka says, so can we just fuck canon and go now?

I don't actually see why not, the author replies, and allows this.

So they go ahead and fly to the palace, and Kuei is thoroughly traumatized by the idea of there being a war, what war, why has no one told him there is a war (or that sky bison are not extinct, can he ride—?) (YES, says Sokka, HOP ON THE NICE BISON LET'S GO SEE A DRILL.)

The drill is pretty convincing. Long Feng, for once, is not. 

"This is a Fire Nation attack drill," Sokka points out, having found his calling as a war tour guide. "And those are scorch marks on your walls. And those are injured soldiers, and that's THE PRINCE OF THE FUCKING FIRE NATION WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING ON THE WALL, why does your expression make me feel like shouting is an over-reaction, how long have you even been standing there."

"Uh, awhile?" Zuko Li waves, as awkwardly as humanly possible without having his hand fall off. And then he has to dodge some waterwhips because Katara has some pent-up aggression and he  _ came out of nowhere,  _ as Zukos do. (But Suki saw the bison and started running up here so he assumed it was something important and how was he supposed to know  _ there's only one sky bison so this is definitely the Avatar's awful lying children again?  _ ...Even if maybe it turned out that they weren't lying, just telling him truths he didn't want to hear.)

"Surely no war could be truly serious if the so-called enemy prince is a member of our own army," Long Feng BSes blithely. 

Which is some pretty solid reasoning.

"Are we at war with your country?" Kuei asks Zuko Li, as naive kings do.

"Super at war," Zuko Li says, making no friends in the Dai Li but suddenly Sokka is in love. And wait, who is that girl face-palming next to him— 

"Suki!"

But anyway Long Feng realizes his secretary filed a few 'there's this weird badly decoded message' memos into the 'not important' bin, aka the trash, so there is another new Joo Dee in the world and he is working hard to cover his ass. He is not yet out of power, but he is no longer in favor.

The Council of Five is Super Okay with the Avatar telling the Earth King everything they were too cowed to, this is super refreshing, and why  _ yes _ Your Majesty we cleverly recruited the Fire Lord's banished son to our side, waste not want not. Now when we win we will have a friendly sovereign to place on the throne (...how were we going to win again?)

(Hey check out this war plan, Sokka says, and slides them some Day of Black Sun pre-plans.)

HEY CHECK OUT THIS WAR PLAN, the Council of Five says.

So messages get sent out to the Northern Water Tribe and the Swamp and YAY HAKODA'S FLEET (which the Generals knew the location of, far be it for Long Feng to ever admit to stealing the Avatar's mail. Just… just quietly add those to next week's incoming messages, and let's pretend this never happened.)

Aren't there any Fire Nation deserters we can recruit? Zuko Li asks, because he's pretty sure (mildly hopeful?) that he's not Literally the Only One.

Oh hey why didn't I think of that, Sokka says, and also takes steps to contact Jeong-Jeong's group. Wow that would have been a huge oversight, Sokka continues, turning to face the camera,  _ not _ contacting the  _ people with Fire Nation intel  _ when planning an  _ invasion of the Fire Nation. _

And suddenly Zuko Li is off house arrest and being treated like a prince  _ which is really weird,  _ and the Council of Five pretends they loved this kid all along, and Zuko Li is like… okay? Sure? And since some people in the barracks still maybe want to shank him while he sleeps which would be Bad For This Plan he's put up in a guest house in the Upper Ring.

Next to the Avatar's. They are neighbors now. Can he please go back to the shank-barracks? Ugh, fine. 

Uh. Hi, Li here?

The waterbender cannot believe this. She is very loudly muttering about how she cannot believe this. But she doesn't waterwhip him, so that's an improvement. 

Suki also moves to the Upper Ring with him, because  _ score  _ free room and board in a super-nice place. 

Did you seriously move in with  _ Prince Zuko,  _ Sokka points out, with much pointing.

Your house is really crowded, Sokka. Ours is the same size for just two people. Plus if we want alone time we just kick Zuko out.

Kick the Prince of the Fire Nation. Out of his own house.

Yeeeep.

...I don't know about you but I am feeling a hankering for some alone time right now.

Zuko Li also does not know:

\- The ancient Kyoshi Island custom of hanging a sock on the door

But fortunately Uncle does, and steers his clueless nephew into the Avatar's house. Which is exactly as awkward as it sounds. Zuko Li gets pressed into a seat at the table by the friendly smiling old man whose letter is still tucked unread in his pocket, across from the twelve-year-old with eldritch powers who seems both nervous and  _ really bouncy-smiley  _ about him being here, and the waterbender slams a plate of food in front of him and actually it looks really good and it's a huge portion, uh thanks? 

That was going to be Sokka's, she says.  _ You better eat it all,  _ she threatens.

Yes sir, Zuko Li says, because the military has taught him how to recognize superior officers and react accordingly, even if he doesn't always put this into practice in the field. 

So begins Zuko Li's tentative visits to his Uncle (and the rest of the Gaang.) It's… weird? One day the Avatar gets right up in his face with that hopeful smile of his and asks 'Do you think we could have been friends' and Zuko Li is like 'uh… I guess?' and it makes the kid _so happy _and _then they are best friends forever _and he no longer has personal space. And that Toph kid. Will not. Stop. Punching him. But she's a kickass sparring partner in the most literal sense of the word, so he will allow it (...he really couldn't stop her, she is a tiny localized force of nature). And Zuko Li's apparent Uncle is, being around him is… It's nice. Zuko Li doesn't get how today's tea is any different than yesterday's, but he likes listening to the old man explain. 

When he asks Katara if she can teach him not to burn rice, she narrows her eyes and puts him to work helping with lunch and is  _ quietly angry  _ and  _ holding knives  _ and—and oh shit he was so nervous he burned the rice again only  _ worse— _

How are you so bad at this

I don't know! OH SHU NOW IT IS ON FIRE

DID YOU JUST SWEAR BY AN EARTH KINGDOM GOD also and this is very important YOU ARE A FIREBENDER

oh right

...Katara really wants to yell at him for chasing them all over the world and being the evil scion of an evil empire, but he keeps trying to help cook (...she just lets him chop things now) and he helps do the dishes and the dishwater is nice and warm, and… and she has to admit, he's changed.

Well yeah I got hit by a rock and lost my memory.

You don't have to be snarky about it. Maybe you  _ haven't  _ changed.

...I don't think I have. I mean. I think this is just me? I don't think losing memories changed me, I think having them did.

She doesn't offer to heal him. He doesn't ask. They make a lot of meals together. 

Also Zuko crashes on their couch a lot, and is having no problem gaining back weight from his time as a refugee, because Katara likes to  _ rage-serve  _ him Sokka's portions whenever her brother and Suki go giggling off to the other house when they should be doing chores. 

(Sokka is totally cool with Zuko Li, he is a  _ bro,  _ we promise to stay off of your bed!)

(...What. What did he mean...?)

(Toph pats him on the shoulder. Which is more upsetting than all the arm punches in the world.)

Meanwhile Zuko Li has of course been sending his weekly reports to Captain My-Earth-Kingdom-Dad. And somewhere along the line Iroh asked to send a letter too, to kindly thank this gentleman who helped look after his nephew, and the Captain replied, and now Uncle and Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad are in a passive-aggressive letter-off exchanging tips on the Care and Feeding of Scout Li— 

I believe you mean Zuko.

He prefers Li. Ask him.

It is better for his recovering mental health to use his real name.

'Better' is respecting his wishes.

(Zuko Li maybe finds his Uncle smiling down at a letter burning  _ really slowly _ between his hands, like that exercise where you keep the leaf burning as long as possible. It's not a nice smile. He, umm. He closes the door.)

(Meanwhile the Captain maybe had a bit of a heart attack when it struck him that 'Li's Uncle' was 'Zuko's Uncle' and 'Zuko's Uncle' was 'the Motherfucking Dragon of the West' so by the transitive property  _ he was writing snippy letters to the Dragon of the West.  _ This instinctive fear of immolation is overridden by all of the bad advice the Dragon is giving his nephew, and the Captain's  _ intense need _ to correct him.)

Li doesn't respond well to vague statements and false sagery like proverbs. Speak to him directly and say exactly what you mean—

Ah, it is lovely how well you think you know my nephew, after caring for him for only a handful of weeks.

(The Captain is found by his men also smiling at his correspondence, in the same way a particularly acrimonious wolf-shark might.)

Zuko Li is unaware that he is in the middle of a custody battle. He is happy to be receiving such supportive letters from Captain His-Earth-Kingdom-Dad, and happy to be learning more about his Uncle (who is the Motherfucking Dragon of the West? Why isn't  _ he _ in prison? Oh, Avatar's teacher, and Kuei still hasn't gotten to the Siege of Ba Sing Se in the history book somebody got him, because he insisted on a firm foundation in history and started his studies from the  _ beginning _ of the Hundred Year War.)

Also to be inserted at this point in the story: fun scenes like "Zuko visits Ying, Than, and baby Hope and accidentally acquires his Earth-Kingdom-Mother" and "Zuko invites Jet and the Freedom Fighters to his house for sparring."

Enter Jet, stage right. 

Wow Zuko has never seen Katara react that violently, even to him. Is… is she your ex?

NO, Katara says.

Kinda, Jet wiggles his hand in a  _ maybe maybe not, _ and gets himself frozen to a wall.

WAIT WAIT WAIT, Sokka says, before Zuko can do the unfreeze-him-with-firebending that he is clearly about to do. Hold up. I need to savor this properly. Hey, Jet. You know this guy? Oh yes, Scout Li, yep. How about his other name? Zuko, good good, Suki told you. How you feeling about the Fire Nation these days, buddy? Oh wow, turning over a new leaf, fresh start, that's great. Okay Zuko, go ahead and unfreeze him.

Go ahead and—? Jet starts.

Zuko unfreezes his friend, and could the Avatar's band of hooligans please refrain from attacking his house guests in the fut— _ HOOK SWORDS IN HIS FACE OH FUCK. _

The following fight is everything Sokka never knew he needed. Especially when Smellerbee and Longshot, after a long non-verbal communication, sit it out. 

"I thought I remembered the name from those wanted posters," 'Bee confides. "But me and 'Shot weren't going to tell him that."

Uncle is mildly alarmed, but Toph and Katara are on standby to intervene if things get out of hand, and it is with non-bending-related warmth in his old heart that he realizes they will only intervene if things turn against his nephew.

It's one of those good ol' drag-it-out-until-both-are-weakly-swinging-swords-and-too-tired-to-seriously-fight fights.

WHAT THE FUCK, JET (pant, wheeze)

I SHOULD BE THE ONE SAYING THAT (wheeze, pant) ...PRINCE OF THE MOTHERFUCKING FIRE NATION?

YES YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT

CLEARLY YES

Sokka is just cuddled up next to Suki, and Suki next to Sokka, both of them deeply satisfied in their souls with this show. 

"He's also the Blue Spirit!" Aang chirps, breaking Jet in a way the Dai Li never could. Not that they even tried, in this AU.

Jet and Zuko Li spars become regular occurrences. If there is a sock on the door they have to use the Avatar's backyard instead, lest a shirtless Sokka throws things at them from the window, and Jet whistles embarrassingly, and Suki laughs somewhere inside as Zuko Li's face redefines the color red. Also Zuko Li is really unclear on whether Jet is actually trying to murder him, especially since not all of these spars are announced. Jet is also unclear on this point. Oh and if Jet is staying for dinner he needs to help cook, here do the rice, Zuko can't to save his life.

HOW CAN YOU SCREW UP RICE

I DON'T KNOW

FUCKING PAMPERED PRINCE

I ALSO BLAME THAT

STOP AGREEING WITH ME. Oh hey 'Bee, pass the salt? Thanks. (Jet is actually really good at cooking, especially in bulk. He had to keep all those kids fed, after all. Katara sit your ass down, he's got this.)

Also: At some point, the anniversary of Lu Ten's death arrives. Zuko and his Uncle take the picnic basket out to that peaceful hill, and Zuko listens to stories of his cousin's life. It's not really about the stories; it's about being there with Uncle, as he tells them.

Meanwhile the plans for the Day of Black Sun progress, with the Council of Five and Pakku and Huu and Hakoda and Jeong-Jeong, who fully appreciates the irony of being welcomed into Ba Sing Se by the Dragon of the West. Basically things proceed as in canon, but with a bigger budget, more people, and better planning, because no one's taken over the Earth Kingdom capital or briefly killed the Avatar or sent the resistance running. 

Gee I wonder what Azula is up to. 

Azula is up to sneaking into the city, is what Azula is up to. She doesn't get the Kyoshi garb in this AU, but the security here is so bad a Fire Nation royal can just take a literal boat into the city for the low low price of disposing of a few travelers and taking their passports and clothes. She picks reasonably clean and well-dressed targets, of course; none of those  _ refugees.  _ And it does not take her long at all to find herself casually running her fingers over the desk of one Long Feng, who is less than pleased with the shifting status quo.

There is an easy solution to both their problems. She needs her brother to be his self-destructively loyal self again, and Long Feng needs the Earth King to stop trusting the Avatar's opinions. A betrayal by one recommended to him by the Avatar should do nicely, don't you agree? Their problems have the same solution: it's time for her brother to take a little vacation to Lake Laogai. 

Getting him there is as easy as forging a letter from Captain His-Earth-Kingdom-Dad. Meet another member of their unit and get some scouting done, sure. Very secret mission, make sure to tell all your little friends that you'll be out of contact for a few days.

Zuko Li is out of contact for a few days. No one is alarmed. He did warn them, after all. And if he comes back a little distant, and haughtier than he's been since the North Pole, and in kind of a bad mood… Well, it's  _ Zuko.  _ And maybe it was some super traumatic mission or something; just give the guy some space. 

He prefers being called Zuko now. Uncle quietly approves. (Suki and Katara and Jet are concerned. Toph does not initially recognize him as the same guy, his reactions are  _ all _ off. Aang and Sokka are pretty sure he's just super shouty because Jet did one of his murder attempts—sorry, his  _ surprise spars you didn't know you wanted  _ right when Zuko got back, when he was already looking tired and stressed out.) 

Meanwhile Zuko is convinced he's been a double-agent all along. He is loyal to Azula and his Father. He's only been bidding his time, Father is wise and this is all a long con, Father will let him come home with honors once Ba Sing Se is theirs, but first they had to make it seem like he was disowned. But that is crazy, because Father loves him and always has and only wanted him to have the glory due to him. Now that his sister is in the city, they'll work together with their contacts in the Dai Li to overthrow the government and capture the Avatar and bring home their traitor Uncle in… in chains, that's what Zuko wants, of course that's what he wants, this has been the plan for years. Because Father always knew Uncle was a traitor, and now they finally have proof the country will accept. He… he's always wanted this. (Why can't he remember wanting this? Why can't he remember anything about his loving Father except a vague sense of duty and dread? How could he have plotted this for years when he  _ doesn't remember those years?  _ But he's certain that this is right, and when his sister talks everything always makes sense but when he's alone again it  _ doesn't,  _ but Azula never lies—) 

He is getting a lot of headaches, Katara, Suki says. Like, cripplingly many. Maybe it's time to offer that healing.

KEEP YOUR FILTHY PEASANT HANDS OFF OF ME

Katara should have known he'd show his true colors again.  _ This _ is the Prince Zuko she knows; Zuko Li was just a weird head-trauma-induced vacation. 

Uncle is worried enough he writes to Captain Imposing-On-His-Pseudo-Fatherly-Turf. The Captain, who has noted a strange shift to formality in his Li's most recent letters, manages to get a leave request approved. 

Which puts him in the city just in time for the coup.

Azula makes her move to take the Dai Li from Long Feng, and from there to take the throne from the Earth King. Her darling big brother helps. But Zuko has been acting  _ hella suspicious  _ lately so the Gaang has been tailing him, and thus they burst in on things mid-coup. Also the army garrison has been gearing up for the Day of Black Sun, which means gathering together their most elite earthbenders for the strike on the Fire Nation capital, which means the Dai Li are not the hottest game in town. Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad helps lead the counter-attack in the city and the push into the palace grounds while Uncle First-Dibs-On-Dad-Replacement and the Gaang push for the throne room.

The coup fails. Zuko and Azula are captured (as are Mai, Ty Lee, and Long Feng.) Zuko is best described as 'guilty-relieved, and very bristly-quiet about it'. He absolutely Will Not talk to his Uncle or his Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad, LEAVE HIM ALONE, he is finally in this prison cell where he should be, he told them he belonged here, he told them he was the enemy and he'd turn on them—

And he can't explain at all why he did, and it really hurts his head to try HE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS ANYMORE can't they just—just go away, go ahead and hate him but leave him alone— 

Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad has heard nasty rumors about the Dai Li. He asks-begs-ORDERS the goddamn waterbender to try healing Li.

He prefers Zuko now, Uncle mutters, with zero satisfaction. 

Katara grudgingly stomps into Zuko's cell to work her magic. And Zuko remembers. Everything. 

Oh fuck he is such an asshole

Yes. Yes you are, Katara agrees, also with zero satisfaction, because here is her cooking buddy back and he clearly wants Toph to provide him a rock to curl up and die under and how could she have gone so long thinking  _ brainwashed Zuko  _ was  _ real Zuko,  _ he was right, this is just him. (She is possibly also an asshole.)

There are hugs from Uncle and Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad. And shoulder-bumps from Suki who-totally-called-it. And a group hug because Aang wants in on this and why not everyone else too and Kuei is glad to participate in this charming custom.

Day of Black Sun planning continues, while Zuko spends time with his dads, dealing with the mental fallout of the brainwashing and suddenly remembering sixteen years of being loyal to the world's shittiest father. Fortunately he has spent a few months now learning the difference between shitty fathers and real fathers, and—and he tentatively asks around and thinks he is being subtle about it, but by the time he comes up to Hakoda and asks what the man would  _ hypothetically  _ do if his son  _ hypothetically  _ disagreed with him publicly, the Water Tribe Chief is pretty ready with  _ 'not  _ burn his face off, son you didn't do  _ anything wrong' _ as an answer. Which is what all the other fathers said too. 

_ What the fuck, Ozai, _ Zuko lets himself think for the first time in his life. And he quietly but firmly allows himself to rejoin the planning meetings to take his father down, because bio!dad is just as bad a metaphorical father to his nation as he is a literal father to his children. 

Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad's leave is over, but he'll see Zuko again on the ships. 

...It's okay to call me Li still. Sir.

Which do you prefer?

Zuko. His name is Zuko, sir. 

_ End Part 2: Lieutenant Zuko Li Ba Sing Se's _


	3. Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation

The allied troops are moving out. Zuko visits his little sister one more time in the Extra Secure cells. She is a ball of rage and plotting, but it's hard to rage when the guards just don't put her food through the door until the fire has stopped and it's hard to plot when they've got only loyal people allowed anywhere near her. Or in the palace at large, really. Recent coup attempt and all that. 

You're a traitor Zuzu.

And you're going to come out on top of this no matter what happens, Azula. 

...She is listening. 

If we win, you're my little sister, and my heir, and fuck if I'm going to let them charge you with anything. You didn't even commit any war crimes you just scared the shit out of their weak-ass leadership. And if we lose, you'll find a way out of this. Of course you will; you're  _ Azula.  _ And father will never know you could have have gotten out sooner. You'll still be his daughter, and  _ his  _ heir. 

...She will take this under consideration. 

Now could she please stop trying to light the guards on fire, he talked to the king and made sure she's getting the best the kitchens have to offer but that doesn't really matter when everything is gross and old by the time she's cooled down enough to eat it.

She will also take that under consideration. Enjoy your regicide attempt, Zuzu.

Thanks, Lala. 

The fleet departs. It is hella better financed and organized than the canon one. Various ships go their own way, to better slip the blockade, and because some of them have a few stops to make first: they have a significant number of Fire Nation deserters aboard, and they are going to use them.

At various points in the Fire Nation, small bands are offloaded to rabble-rouse and build a base for rebellion. Their sales pitch to selective sympathetic nobles is similar to Zuko's pitch to Azula: we don't need you to act. We just need you to  _ not _ act. If we win, support us publically. If we lose, this conversation never happened. 

They get a lot of quiet agreement.

The Avatar's group is one such band. Uncle is going his own route because putting both princes in one location would be a terrible idea if and when Ozai catches wind of this, but that still leaves the Gaang up two members from canon: Zuko and Suki get to tour the Fire Nation with them.

Commencing operation 'let Zuko meet the people of his nation incognito'. Because we all hunger for it. Also operation 'let Suki actually be a contributing Gaang member instead of a background character', becuase girl is awesome and she deserves it. Many of the same stops from canon would occur: everybody loves a good Zuko-meets-Hama  _ holy shit nightmare fodder  _ chapter, and he should definitely see how the war is literally poisoning his country at that town downriver of the munitions factory. 

New adventures can occur as well, because they're meeting Piandao and other nobles in a semi-official capacity, rather than working totally undercover. And probably at some point Ozai  _ should _ catch wind of all this—some Water Tribe ships were spotted too close to shore, some nobles sought extra favor by ratting their visitors out, some loyal citizens recognize their traitor prince and dutifully report him. Insert various escape hijinks, and perhaps a dedicated pursuer to serve as an antagonist for the arc (but not Combustion Man, who is kind of a one-trick murder-pony.) Let's get someone with motivations and a personality. Captain Izumi of the Royal Guard from Towards the Sun fame or a similar character would serve excellently to showcase conflicted loyalties between country and Fire Lord as she worked to catch the world's hope and her former prince. Especially when they're traveling the nation, causing objectively good things to happen in their wake. Fixing problems on the local level that Ozai never had the time or inclination to even read the reports about. 

It would be most excellent for there to be a scene where she  _ could _ have caught Zuko, but just barely lets him slip by, because he's doing something so damn good she couldn't interrupt it. And another scene where she  _ does _ catch him, and does  _ not _ let him slip free, because this time nothing was on the line (except the future of her nation, shit), and her loyalty to the throne compels her to put up a decent fight when the Gaang comes to rescue him. She wakes up later with a pounding headache, and has never been so relieved to have been defeated. Then she picks herself back up, and keeps tracking them, because she hasn't let her personal feelings get in the way of her duty in decades and she isn't about to start now. (She  _ isn't,  _ damn it.) Bonus points for this character to remain opposed to them right up to the story's end, proud to never have gone traitor even though she was always on the wrong side. She will be  _ hella surprised  _ to be pardoned, and welcomed back into her position under a lord who deserves someone like her.

But that's getting a bit ahead. Rewind, play. 

The Day of Black Sun arrives. The Fire Nation deserters have been largely traveling over ground, collecting members from local resistances as they went, and infiltrating into the capital in small groups. The Water Tribes and Earth Kingdom and Kyoshi Warriors come by boat and crazy submarines, as in canon. 

Folks trying to write from this outline can decide whether our heros win here, or if they lose and have to regroup before the comet. If it were me? I'd give them the win.

In canon, Ozai had advanced warning of the invasion, and still chose to stay in the capital in a bunker whose location other members of the royal family would know of. He had no way of knowing that Iroh  _ hadn't _ conveyed that location to Jeong-Jeong or other Fire Nation deserters, and no way of knowing the fleet wouldn't include said Fire Nation deserters. Ozai, you done fucked up. With no Azula to lead our heroes on a wild goose chase away from the bunker throne room, there's no reason Zuko, Uncle, the Gaang, and a crack team of earth and water benders couldn't make their way there in time for the eight minute eclipse window. Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad can either come with them directly, or succeed in punching through the Fire Nation defenses with the rest of Zuko's unit and meet them there. 

Hey Ozai. Hey, hey Ozai. You know what you should have learned? How to use a weapon besides your bending. Like your son. You remember your useless, untalented son. Look at him being all useless and untalented and taking down your last line of defense with his inferior pointy sticks.

Final kill goes to Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad, in my version. After allowing the Gaang and Zuko to cathartically kick Ozai around first. No Aang, if there are military-minded adults in the room with you, we are  _ not _ leaving Ozai alive. There is no tactical advantage and numerous disadvantages and the man is many-times war criminal who really should have been executed in the canon post-war anyway, if the world's justice system was at all functional. Also the asshole dared to touch Li. ...Zuko. The Captain meant to say Zuko.

I told you sir, you can call me whichever one you want —says Zuko, a little distantly, staring down at the body of his bio!dad like he doesn't expect this to actually be over and any second Ozai is going to get up and start berating him for failing to assassinate him, like he's failed at everything in his life, there's no way this can be over in a paltry eight minutes, and even though he can feel the sun returning and the warmth of his bending coming back he's still shaking— 

Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad and Iroh share A Look. Double-teamed hugs are a go. 

_ End Part 3: Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Tumblr](https://muffinlance.tumblr.com)!


	4. Epilogue: Child CustoTea

Uncle is on throne. Any attempts to teashop AU his retirement while his literal child of a nephew overworks himself to bring peace will result in Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad threatening to be Zuko's regent. Uncle decides not to call this bluff. (It was not a bluff.)

Prince Zuko aka Lieutenant Zuko Li is an ambassador between the Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom. He's unexpectedly welcome on Kyoshi Island, too, especially after that time Suki took him out drinking with her other warriors. He is an even happier drunk in peacetime than he was during the war, and a really good sport about drunk-sparring in a dress. Back in the Earth Kingdom, he returns goodGirl!Song the Ostrich-Horse to Song the Actual Human Person, sorry he was an asshole, please accept this generous donation to your clinic and these offers to train with the most prestigious healers in three nations, and if you still want to press charges here is his Captain's contact information, really he's so sorry, but he swears he's turned his life around, he's a lieutenant in the Earth Army now and also the Fire Lord's heir—

WHAT THE FUCK JUNIOR

He also keeps in touch with Lee's family. This is his Earth-Kingdom-brother, after all. They are a little leery of this firebender thing (he is maybe waiting to break the 'Fire  _ Prince' _ thing to them, it is nice to have one town he can go and be immediately put to work fixing a roof) but they knew him for a lot longer than a day in this AU, and he is definitely still the same kid who helped put their family back together. So. Here to take them up on that adoption offer? He is getting pretty full up on dads, but he's okay with having more uncles and aunts, if that's okay…? (He is getting used to being adopted, there is a Procedure and the Procedure is Don't Fight It Struggling Makes Them Hug Harder.)

Jet occasionally tries to murder him when they cross paths, but gets  _ really angry  _ if any of his new Freedom Fighters (read: adorable attack war orphans) try to hurt the Fire Prince, that is HIS job. 

Oh hey Jet—*sound of swords clashing together*—I'm planning to head up past Omashu, are the roads clear?

Eh, they're not bad. *tries to chop off an arm, only gets a sleeve* So hey you know how you are an inherently horrible human—

Wait did you just acknowledge a Fire Nation citizen as human? *blocks near-fatal slash to his throat*

Fuck you, also you owe us some war reparations. *does a fancy impractical spin thing just because he can*

If you are asking me to fund your orphanage you could just say so. *is literally just standing out of range of fancy spin* Also, yes. 

It is not an orphanage it is a FREEDOM SCHOOL *murdering intensifies* 

Uh-huh *casually checks position of the sun while dodging* So I'm not going to make it to the next town by sundown because  _ someone  _ is blocking the road, can I crash with you?

Yeah sure *intercepts a knife to Zuko's back that one of his more go-getting kids just sent flying, then gets back to the murdering* 

Moving on, Zuko picks up Azula from the Ba Sing Se jail and starts taking her traveling with him, because leaving her alone to gather power bases is a no good plan. Another no-go is leaving alone a fourteen-year-old whose abuser was murdered before she could come to terms with the fact she was even a victim. There is sibling bonding and sibling fighting and sibling if-you-die-I'm-next-in-line well-if-I-die-you-have-to-sit-through-all-these-meetings. Azula likes the scheming parts of these new peace accords, not the endless bickering over trivialities and the hideously awkward social events. She becomes more and more okay with letting Zuko deal with those. He becomes more and more okay with her disappearing for two days and when she comes back the heads of the local war-mongering families are donating half their fortunes to the peace effort as if their lives depend on it. 

What the fuck, the rest of the Gaang says.

That's my sister, Zuko says.

...That is definitely his sister, Captain Shit-I-Just-Got-A-Daughter-Too says.

Azula is getting sick of her brother pointing out that the problems faced by post-war Earth Kingdom towns are quite similar to those in post-war Fire Nation towns, and the people much the same minus the terrible Earth Kingdom fashion sense, she  _ gets  _ it Zuzu, stop trying to make this field trip into a life lesson about harmony and international peace and blah-blah-blah. If she wanted to talk about  _ that _ she'd disappear you in a desert town and take your place at the peace meetings. Also she has not maimed anyone she shouldn't in six months, per their agreement she demands to go to Uncle's dragon island and kidnap some eggs to hatch.

Fuck yes dragon field trip.

Caring for a fireproof pet that is dependant upon her turns out to be a very good experience for Azula, particularly when she realizes that fear is  _ not _ the most effective motivator. Apparently food and being a warm and comfortable perch to sleep on are. This is inherently baffling, but she is adaptable. 

_ What the Flying Fuck Li, _ Zuko's unit says, when he shows up with a baby dragon draped over his shoulders and a baby sister who scares any person who has not had a traumatic head injury. 

Meanwhile, Aang went on a tour of the Air Temples to lay his people to rest with the proper rites, and to let go of his grief now that he has time to process it. At the Eastern Air Temple he runs across an old friend of his people who's been waiting for him. Guru Pathik leads him to unlocking his chakras and mastering the Avatar state at his own pace. It might take him awhile—he's only just found his new family, he's not sure he can stand to let them go, even if it is a metaphorical-and-spiritual letting go instead of a literal one. But he has time for this, just like he has time to finish mastering his firebending. And he'd like to get back up to the North Pole and learning healing, too; that's what the world really needs.

Back in his palace, surrounded by much more trustworthy advisors, Kuei finally gets to the chapter on the Siege of Ba Sing Se. He is suddenly very glad that the Dragon of the West is on the other side of the ocean. And friendly to the Earth Kingdom. Kuei is going to make extra sure that the Dragon's nephew has safe travels in his kingdom, let it be known that it is Our Will that not a hair on this kid's head be touched, seriously, Iroh will burn Us to the ground. 

It's only been a few months but people are already pretty sure that these Scout Li stories are exaggerated. How could one kid do that much AND be the Blue Spirit AND be the banished prince? University professors are already writing about the organic growth of the 'Scout Li' folklore and its quaint spread through both Fire and Earth troops, in a time when both war-weary nations needed a symbol for hope. Well, not hope. More of a 'fuck the establishment' character, really. Whatever the anthropological fancy-term equivalent of that is. Zuko does not know how to feel about reading literary interpretations of his actual life, never mind the play adaptations.

The Gaang keeps in close touch, as lifelong friend-families do. When the Ember Island Players put on the world premier of The Fire Prince Scout, they drag Zuko to see it, because they still secretly hate him. It is just as bad as he feared. But… he doesn't actually hate it as much as he thought he would. (That's because of the company, Lieutenant Sparky, Toph says, with an affectionate haymaker to the bicep.)

Lieutenant Jee is allowed home from his goddamn freezing-ass North Pole prison as part of the ongoing peace efforts. He learns of Zuko's rank. He collects his back wages, and takes the surviving members of the Wani's crew out drinking.

(He later learns that the Earth Kingdom army pays its officers  _ slightly more _ than the Fire Nation navy's equivalent ranks. This time, he drinks alone.)

As a point of fact, the enlistment papers Zuko signed with the Earth Army clearly state he has four and a half more years of service before he can be honorably discharged and if anyone THINKS he is going to take a  _ dishonorable _ discharge they Have Not Met Him. So. Technically the Prince of the Fire Nation is  _ still _ a Lieutenant in His Majesty Kuei's army. He's just on very special assignment. Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad demands and receives his weekly report letters, and reserves the right to perform Surprise Inspections by visiting his fire-son. Zuko writes diligently and makes sure he mostly kinda sorta sticks to his itineraries, plus or minus some What The Fuck time, so that the Captain can Surprise Inspect whenever he wants. 

Fire Lord Iroh is not jealous. At all.

But he is mollified somewhat by his nephew's frequent visits back to the capital, and their long talks and regular correspondence, and Zuko has begun bringing home  _ tea! _

Captain Earth-Kingdom-Dad helped me pick it out.

…

……

Iroh hates tea now, The End.

_ End Part 4, Epilogue: Child CustoTea _


	5. Epilogue's Epilogue: Zuko Fucks with History

Future historians will speculate on why the bulk of Fire Lord Iroh the Peacebringer's correspondence was with a relatively low-ranking member of the Earth Kingdom Army. The letters themselves were tragically lost in the fire of insert-date-here, but their destinations remain immortalized in the royal hawkers' ledgers. Years later, this will lead a fringe group to put forth the laughable theory that Scout Li was a Real Historical Figure. 

Serious!Face Historians will point out that Scout Li was already considered a part of local folklore in contemporary sources, and if 'Scout Li' did indeed ever exist as a real person, he must have pre-dated the End-of-War time period. 

And yes yes, there are  _ thousands _ of actual 'Scout Li's' in the Earth Kingdom army, of course the fringe theorists can find plenty of documentation for that. But the Scout Li of legend has associations with the Blue Spirit and, more rarely, with the young Prince Zuko during his ill-recorded banishment period (most primary sources relating to this time were lost when his ship was destroyed by pirates; it is unclear whether he spent time in the Earth Kingdom as a refugee, despite the popularity of the prince-as-pauper mythos developed around him). 

Prince Zuko's association with the Scout tales was most likely an effort by Fire Nation troops to develop their own counter-stories of a 'Scout Zuko' to rival the Earth Army's 'Scout Li'. Post-war cultural transfer blended the two oral traditions together. The much older Blue Spirit stories carry similar themes of trickery and daring in the face of steep odds, and so were co-opted into the newer tales, resulting in three semi-mythological figures being merged into one. 

There is, all Serious!Face Historians agree, no way one person did all the deeds ascribed to Scout Li and  _ then  _ became Fire Lord Zuko the Dragon Sage, with all of his  _ very well documented  _ international exploits. And that's without even touching on General "Wings of Justice" Azula, his right-hand woman, and  _ her _ fiery mythos.

_ That's exactly the point, _ the fringe theorists point out, as if one craziness supports another. 

But if any of what they said were true 

it would make Zuko's life the very definition 

of What The Fuck.

_ End Part 5, Epilogue's Epilogue: Zuko Fucks with History _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Outline complete. Level up!
> 
> Reminder: if you were inspired by this in any way, please feel free to Write The Thing! Just give a shout out back to this outline in your author's notes. Preferably click the "This work is a remix, a translation, a podfic, or was inspired by another work" checkbox when subbing your story, then we will be linked together. WOO TWO-WAY READER TRANSFER. 
> 
> I am definitely not writing this, because frankly I did just write this, this fucker is 14k. That is what most people consider an actual story not-an-outline. WhydidIdothistomyself. 
> 
> #Zero Regrets
> 
> #This Concludes Our Test of the Emergency Outlining System

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr](https://muffinlance.tumblr.com) || [More Stories](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MuffinLance/pseuds/MuffinLance/works) || [Update Schedule/Profile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MuffinLance/profile)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [The Tale of Scout Li: Book 1 Li](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21801445) by [Empress_of_Trash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Empress_of_Trash/pseuds/Empress_of_Trash), [TrashySide (Empress_of_Trash)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Empress_of_Trash/pseuds/TrashySide)
  * [How to Save the World Without Really Trying](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24298009) by [Twird96](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twird96/pseuds/Twird96)


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